Apr 28, 2010

Scrambled thoughts....

I know that you have all heard about the term 'scrambled eggs' (it's delicious too), but don't know if you have ever tried to associate thoughts with it....aye! I don't know what am I blabbering about...coz well....my thoughts are really scrambled today!!! Ok, so why has this situation arrived??? Hmmm....because I'm leaving today for Ranchi for my M.Phil in the Central institute of Psychiatry. I had been dreaming of this for years...this is more like my dream has come true...and yet I feel so depressed!!!! I should be happy, excited.....but I'm feeling as if I'm leaving my country, my people and going to North Pole!!!! Ok maybe I'm overreacting...maybe I'm being emotionally vulnerable that's why I'm behaving like this. My dad is constantly telling me that" Beta, you have made your own decision. Now you have to bear the effects."...I understand all these philosophical notions, but somehow self doubt is creeping in within me....what if whatever decision I had taken is not good for me...will I be able to adjust to hostel life (with just 1 hour or less time of running water supply through out the day, 8.30 am classes), what about the studies??? Am I intelligent enough to understand everything...will I be a good psychologist??? My goodness!!!So many questions and I seem out of answers!!!!

Anyways, I won't keep on blabbering ...I would end now.Already I'm feeling like a bipolar patient (right now suffering from depression!!)...I might end up as a patient there!!!

Ciao and I will let everyone know how's life going on there.

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