More than 13
years ago, I had written for the first time anything about Namma. More than 13 years ago, Namma had her brain tumor operation. Nearly 14 years ago, she had a road accident,
where she got struck from behind by a taxi and had a possible concussion. Nearly
14 years when we had gone to visit Namma at her place after the accident, I realized for the first time that our indomitable Namma can also be a bed-ridden person for a
change. More than 13 years ago after seeing Namma with a bandage all around
her head, lying unconscious on the hospital bed, I made the realization for first time that one day there is
a possibility of not having her in our lives.
But somehow she
bounced back. Somehow she bounced back from the brain tumor surgery, subsequent
delirious states, bed sores, personal and family setbacks. She bounced back in
the way only she could do it, showing skeptical people like us that she is made
of titanium. In all these years, she has seen deaths in her family – losing her husband while making her slow but gradual recovery from her prolonged illness following her surgery; losing her
younger sister while she was admitted in a hospital and only getting to know of the death after the sister's funeral services were over; losing both her son-in-laws to cancer, attending
both the funerals and watching her grandchildren performing the rites. Yet she never completely broke down, but stood strong and steady for the rest of us.
She has been a witness
to so many life events in our lives, naye, she has been involved in so many life
events in our lives that I don’t think we can think of a time when she had not
been part of our lives. At least I cannot imagine any such moment in my life. And
now we are at the verge of losing her to inevitability. And this time, we are
losing hope as we are watching her in her frail body fighting against the
ticking crocodile. This time, even she seems to have given up all hope. All she wants, is for the pain to be over. Now we are
just waiting and watching and praying to buy some time. And as for me, I don’t know
what will happen when the eventual thing will happen, all that I can say it will
be like half of my universe would obliterate with a snap of a finger. My Thanos
seems to have arrived and I am no Bruce Banner or Tony Stark to res-snap and bring things
back. All that I can do is to pray for her to be happy and peaceful when the
time comes. And to know that she is very much loved and forever will be.